The sun is down. It’s dark and in my world that means dark thoughts. Those are my . Dark music, relaxing or serious, dark lyrics, dark ideas, dark movies. The truth is this way sometimes. We live in both conditions equally, for the celestial objects are round, and though we orbit in an elliptical pattern, there is quite possibly an equal amount of both.
Sometimes we know something is going to happen before it does. I learn new things each day, that while not proven, are true enough that I cannot look at life the same way anymore. My pursuits in life were always strongly resisted by people who simply had the capability to do that. I’m left to struggle in the face of it, and continue, as hellish as it is. Whether I chose this path or it chose me remains to be seen. It has affected me profoundly in ways that would take hours to describe. Let alone the open mind to listen to it, as that is a rarity.
Now the time has come for those which I looked up to the most to turn on me. The system is built this way, and I recognized it years in advance. They said that this pursuit would be difficult, but never why. Nevertheless I am compelled forward, not only for the accomplishment, but to counteract the divisions in this society that have led to my poverty of life, love and happiness. I must remember that suffering is what I must expect and when doing that realize that it is the price I pay for going against the rules laid out for me.